Joyfully Her Podcast

The Truth About Motherhood They Don’t Tell You

• Nicole • Season 1 • Episode 1

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The journey of motherhood is a divine calling that shapes eternity despite being undervalued by modern society. Through sharing my personal struggle as a first-time mom experiencing undiagnosed postpartum depression, I reveal how motherhood serves as a profound refinement process.

• Motherhood requires laying down our lives daily for our children, reflecting Christ's sacrificial love
• Society often overlooks the eternal significance of nurturing souls within our homes
• The challenging transition to motherhood can feel isolating when we're expected to only express joy
• Changing our perspective to view motherhood as a divine assignment transforms difficult seasons
• Like Nazareth and Galilee, our "little places" at home have profound importance in God's kingdom

Join me for our next episode where we'll discuss creating balance in motherhood while embracing the joy God intends for us on this journey. Hit the like button and subscribe to join the movement!


Need to create more balance as a mom? Visit us at www.joyfullyher.com and take our balanced quiz and create a custom plan just for you!

Speaker 1:

You have a unique God-given purpose as a wife and a mother, and your influence is vital to shaping the next generation. Yet modern society has distorted the true beauty and power of a woman who serves in these roles. From anxiety to depression, being a mother and a wife seems harder than ever before. Welcome to the Joyfully Her podcast. Hi, I'm Nicole Gabrielle, a Christian therapist, and I've helped many women like you build healthier marriages, heal emotionally and, most of all, grow closer to our Creator, god. Here we blend biblical encouragement, practical wisdom and mental health insights to empower you to thrive and cultivate a lifelong well-being. Subscribe now and join us as we address what modern society overlooks about motherhood and beyond, so you can live out your God-given calling as a wife and mother with confidence and joy. Let's dive in. Let's dive in. I'm Nicole, I am a Christian therapist and a mom of three. I've helped many women many of times in my therapy practice resolve issues related to anxiety, depression, postpartum depression. I know about these things and so welcome to Joyfully Her, your mom.

Speaker 1:

This episode is just for you, no matter what stage that you're in. I want to share with you the one lesson that I learned being a mom of for the past nine years and mom of three, and where I started on my journey and my motherhood journey Exactly nine years ago. I was that first time mom that I was just speaking about, overwhelmed and really felt unsupported and isolated. I remember having my daughter Sophia nine years ago. I was so excited Me and my husband were so excited being first time parents. We just really just wanted to learn everything that we could to be the best parents possible. But when I had Sophia, it was a very challenging time and I remember we lived in a small city of a little town in North Carolina called Monroe, north Carolina, and it was during a time where I was away from my family, away from a lot of the support that I would have had with having my daughter, and it was just me and my husband. He was in pharmacy school and we really had to do these things ourselves and really prepare for our daughter. And so that time I was, like I said, I was pregnant with my daughter and it was time to give birth and I was literally in labor for literally three days. It was the hardest time of my life. I remember that so vividly. I remember even the doctor giving me a break from the Pitocin that I was on because I was laboring hard. I didn't even know. As a first time mom, I'm like, why is this happening? And I've just pran through that whole labor. And finally my daughter came. Sophia, beautiful baby girl. She came and we were just so elated. Remember taking her home. She's all swaddled up in her pink and her little bonnet. It was just so relieved that we got through the labor. And now, little did I know it's like, okay, let's do this. We're literally raising a tiny human being. And so when I brought Sophia home, it was exciting but also exhausting. I was so overwhelmed, being a first time mom and, you know, being alone. Yes, my mom came for a little bit, but then she had to go back home.

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I remember one day, specifically, I was sitting on the couch with Sophia and she was crying so much. We were just sitting on the couch, I was doing everything that I could for her. I was swaddling her, I made sure she was chained, she had her milk, but she was not having it. It was such a challenging day. And so I remember just sitting there, had some music planned and I was just like you know, what am I going to do, lord? What is happening. She just kept crying and crying. And I remember years ago not years ago, but a few months ago I remember one of the nurses when I was taking one of my caregiving class you know, when you first take those classes at the hospital to learn about caregiving for the baby the nurse said specifically when you find that your baby is crying for really no reason that you, that you really don't know about, they're clean, they're dry, they're fed. And when you find that your baby is crying uncontrollably, go ahead and put them in the bassinet, make sure that they're safe, but put them there to give them and yourself a moment. And I remember that day so vividly that I had to put Sophia in her bassinet. I really had to just take a break. I mean, I was crying. I remember just crying, stepping away and really feeling like helpless, like I really did not know what to do. There was nobody that I could call. It was very hard for me.

Speaker 1:

That was one of the most transformative times in my motherhood and I'll share with you why. If we look in the word in 1 Peter 1.6, it says in all of this you greatly rejoice through now fora little, while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials and some people will say, well, maybe motherhood is not necessarily a trial per se, but for some people it really is. There are some people that really go through difficult times with that transition and it's sometimes hard to really express that as a first time mom or even just a mom in general, because society or even within your community, it's expected that you have this great joy being a mom. There's really, you know not if there is challenges you should still be happy and glad about, you know, being a mother, because it's supposed to be a joyful time for you in your life. But what happens when it's not? And for me in that moment it really wasn't as enjoyable for many months. I actually discovered and we'll talk a little bit more about this over our time together in another podcast but I discovered later that I had undiagnosed postpartum depression and so that made it even more challenging for me. But I had no idea at the time, I didn't have the tools that I have now to even recognize that.

Speaker 1:

And so I say motherhood being a refining period, and this also kind of leads us into the scripture. The scripture in John 15, where it talks about greater love has no one than this than to lay down your life for one's friend, and really putting that into the context of motherhood is that we, as mothers, are laying down our lives every single day for our children. Hey, my friend loving the conversation so far. If, joyfully, her has blessed your heart, tap subscribe so you never miss an episode and remember motherhood is so much more sweeter together. So take a second and share this podcast with a friend who needs encouragement too. Let's spread faith, joy and real talk about mom life and wife life, one episode at a time.

Speaker 1:

And, to be honest, that is an adjustment. That's something that we don't kind of talk about. It is something that our flesh goes through that we really don't acknowledge that adjustment and that, to be perfectly honest, your flesh sometimes doesn't want to lay down your life. You want to do what you want to do, right. Sometimes I'm a mom, I want to scroll on Instagram, I want to sleep whenever I want to sleep, but a lot of times that just does not happen because I have another human being that I need to take care of, and so I think that is the one lesson that I learned, and even the moms that I work with in therapy practice is that they really talk about some of the refinement, the growth that they've come to over the years as being a mom, and how difficult and challenging it is. And so I think that's one thing, that, for first time moms and even if you're a seasoned mom I think that is okay to acknowledge these things. I think that is okay to acknowledge these things. I think the more we can acknowledge this, the more we can really gain perspective about what is really happening when we first become mothers or when we're. You know, even if you're not a mom, you're, you're sowing into other people. When you become a wife, there's a certain point of sacrifice that you make for your husband, and we'll talk about that in the future as well. And so that was one of the lessons that I felt like, wow, okay, god, I don't know if I was ready for this, but God was really telling me you are ready for this. I have called you to this assignment because we have to realize that motherhood is an assignment, it's a calling, and that it is something that God has given us.

Speaker 1:

The Bible talks about that children are a heritage from the Lord. It's a good thing. You know children and raising and rearing children, but in our society sometimes it's just not as valued. And this is what, joyfully Her is about. It's really for us as women to be celebrated and to celebrate our roles as wives and mothers and the impact that we have for the kingdom. I mean, you know, if we can imagine the souls that we're leading, not only on the outside of our walls of our homes, but inside our homes, and the nurturing that we're doing and the souls that we're winning for Christ, I mean, this is something that is lasting, of eternal value, and so that is one of the things that I want to encourage you as a mother.

Speaker 1:

There is a poem that I came across and I want to share this poem because it really resonated with me in my season, even now as a mother. And let's read this poem by Mead McGuire. And the poem says Father, where should I work today? And my love flowed, warm and free. Then he pointed out a tiny spot for me and said Huh, go, tend that spot for me. I answered quickly oh, no, not that, not that, why. No one would ever see, no matter how well my work was done, not that little place for me. And the word he spoke it was not stern, he answered me tenderly Ah, little one, search that heart of thine. Art thou working for them or for me?

Speaker 1:

Nazareth was a little place, and so was Galilee. I say that poem to say sometimes in our society, being a mother, and especially a woman of faith, and raising your children is not seen as great, or this big career with this big salary and all of the things and the prestige that may come with that. But God has called us to the little place in our home, including what he called Christ to. And we know, as it says in that poem, nazareth. Nazareth was a little place and so was Galilee, where our Lord came from, and so he can use, god can use the little places and in fact he wants to use those places for his glory. It's just that we have to be open to that.

Speaker 1:

And so if you are a mom, I want you to think about this question how can you change your view of motherhood?

Speaker 1:

Because that's something that I had to do nine years ago as a first time mom.

Speaker 1:

I had to start changing my perspective of what I was going through and the challenges that came with raising my daughter and now my three kids.

Speaker 1:

Do you see it as a divine assignment from the Lord, or is it just some more mundane task that you have to do sweeping the floor, like I mentioned earlier, cleaning the dishes, all the things that come with taking care of a family? Is there value, eternal value there, and how can you remember the eternal value that God himself has called you to, to be the mother that he called you to? This is something that I think about often now, and so maybe you're a new mom, maybe you're a seasoned mom, ready to create more balance, and maybe you do still have those overwhelmed seasons, as I do myself. How can you create more balance? So that is the next thing that I want to share with you. I want you to listen to our next podcast, where I am talking about balance and what that means for moms in this time of their life. Hit the like button and also subscribe to join the movement as we continue on this journey in our motherhood, even as wives, and we embrace the joy that God has for us on this journey.