Joyfully Her Motherhood Podcast

The Juggling Act: Finding Balance as a Mother and Wife (Balance Series)

• Nicole Gabrielle • Season 1 • Episode 3

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Feeling overwhelmed by the competing demands of motherhood, marriage, and everything else on your plate? You're not alone. This eye-opening episode reveals startling statistics: one in four women experience anxiety or depression while balancing their roles as wives and mothers, with women twice as likely to be diagnosed with anxiety disorders due to this emotional overwhelm.

Beyond the numbers lies a powerful reframing of how we approach "balance" in our lives. Rather than maintaining perfect equilibrium, what if we viewed life more like juggling? Some balls will inevitably drop—the key is recognizing which ones can bounce and which are made of glass. Drawing from Ecclesiastes 3:1, we explore how embracing life's seasons gives us permission to focus on what matters most in each chapter of our journey.

The Proverbs 31 woman, often misunderstood as doing it all simultaneously, actually demonstrates this seasonal approach perfectly. Her various accomplishments weren't happening at once but throughout different periods of her life. I share my own painful lesson of trying to maintain a demanding career with a newborn and two other children until the Holy Spirit nudged me to recognize my season had changed.

This episode challenges you to honestly assess what's on your plate right now. Does everything belong there in this current season? Does your work meet "the exchange rate of heaven" as described in 1 Corinthians 3:12-13? Through practical suggestions like drawing out your commitments and prayerfully evaluating each one, you'll discover how to create space for what truly matters. Subscribe now and join our community of women seeking to honor God in every season while finding authentic joy in our divine calling as wives and mothers.

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Speaker 1:

You have a unique God-given purpose as a wife and a mother, and your influence is vital to shaping the next generation. Yet modern society has distorted the true beauty and power of a woman who serves in these roles. From anxiety to depression, being a mother and a wife seems harder than ever before. Welcome to the Joyfully Her podcast. Hi, I'm Nicole Gabrielle, a Christian therapist, and I've helped many women like you build healthier marriages, heal emotionally and, most of all, grow closer to our Creator, god. Here we blend biblical encouragement, practical wisdom and mental health insights to empower you to thrive and cultivate a lifelong well-being. Subscribe now and join us as we address what modern society overlooks about motherhood and beyond, so you can live out your God-given calling as a wife and mother with confidence and joy. Let's dive in On our balance series, really sharing with you my heart about what I think the Proverbs 31 woman can teach us and that really can help us in the overwhelming seasons of our lives, especially we're talking about when you first have your baby the newborn stage, the toddler stage, then, for some people, the teen stage. All of that comes into play. All of that has its place in our life, but then how can we? We're focused on enjoying being a mother, having joy, creating balance, continuing in that. But how can we do that really effectively? And so we've been in the balance series. We're talking about this. We're going deeper, really to explore this at a greater level. I want you to know that one in four women experience either anxiety or depression throughout their lifetime due to balancing their career, their just household duties, everything that comes along with life as a wife and a mother, and I found that quite fascinating, of course, as a mental health therapist, but also it is something that's not widely talked about, and so that's why we're here on Joyfully Her, because we're really trying to have these conversations about what is really happening with women in their mental health and what they're experiencing. Another study found that women are twice as likely to be diagnosed with an anxiety disorder due to lack of balance and emotional overwhelm that they experienced throughout their lifetime as being a wife and a mother, and so these are definitely the things that we are talking about, bring into light and really want to explore why are these statistics so high and what can we do about this?

Speaker 1:

I know that we're in this balance series. Like I said, it is a three part series where we are just trying to explore different solutions to help us manage and improve our ability to manage everything that we have that God has blessed us with. But what if we take a step back and look at, instead of the word, balance even though I'll still use that word but can we think of the concept of juggling Right? If you think about, have you ever been to the circus? Of course, and you see the clowns and the juggling and all that. They have perfected that. But me personally, I can't do anything like that, but I will drop balls. That's just going to happen for me. But what if we look at the balancing in terms of, in the context of juggling right and juggling for the ones that are not professionals, the balls drop, there are going to be balls that stay up in the air and there's going to be balls that drop, and so we look at this from a perspective of.

Speaker 1:

There are times in my life where things were going to drop. Let me share with you some examples. So there are going to be times in our life where it requires a lot more of us than where you really used to right, I shared, on the first episode of Joyfully Her, my story about the season that I was in as a new mom, having a newborn, and that requires so much of you. That is just what the nature of the work that we need to do to really nurture our children. But there are also times where you have maybe a teen and maybe that season keyword season, that's the keyword today that looks different for you, of course, from when, of course when they were a newborn. And then you have people that have are empty nesters but in they have maybe more time on their hands. But what if they're caring for an aging parent? And that also puts them into a season to where they're using a lot of time to really care for their aging parent. Those are the examples that we can point out in our life and that kind of gives you the clue and that is where we are headed.

Speaker 1:

When we talk about the Proverbs 31 woman, I really think that she recognized well the seasons in her life, right seasons in her life Right. Like I said prior in the second and the first part of the balance series I did talk about towards the end, that the Proverbs 31 woman was not just what we when we read that passage. It was not just her one time in her life that was over her lifetime. So we really have to put that into perspective. When it talks about and I have my Bible here she considers a field and buys it Out of her earnings. She plants a vineyard, hey, she's a businesswoman, right, but with that season of her being a businesswoman may not been the same time that she was actually giving birth to her children. So we really have to put those things into perspective, and this is something that I had to learn the hard way. I'm going to share my story about what happened to me, and the Holy Spirit quickly got me situated about learning this valuable lesson. And it says in his word, in Ecclesiastes 3.1, it talks about there's a time and a season for everything under the heavens. Right, there is a season. The Bible talks about that a time to be born, a time to die. There is a season for everything under the sun, and I think in our modern day society, we forget that our life is seasonal and that we really need to take into account the season that God has placed us in and I'll share with you.

Speaker 1:

Years ago, a couple years ago, when I was pregnant with my third baby, my precious baby boy, noah, I was working, I had just finished graduate school as a social worker, and I was so eager, right, I was so eager to get a job, and this job was salary and anybody know, in the social work world that's gold, right and so I was excited and I remember it's so funny that I went on the interview At the time the interviewee did not know that I was pregnant. We had been talking over the phone and when she saw me she's like oh and so that had happened and I was pretty much offered the position and thrusted into full time, around the clock work and it was something that I just did not even know what I was getting myself into. I remember a good friend of mine who was also in the field. She was like Nicole, are you sure you want to do this? You're about to have a baby, and I'm like I can do this. I got this right. I got my cape on, so I had my son, and then I took maybe about a couple weeks off and then, boom, it was ready.

Speaker 1:

It was go time for me to build up my caseload and I was driving everywhere and my son was staying home with a nanny that my job had paid for. But it was so challenging. Um, but it was so challenging. We're talking about breastfeeding, um, sleep deprivation around the clock, and I still have to wake up early to make sure that I'm getting to my work on time. I remember one day, specifically, that my son was sick and I had to take care of him, of course. So I had to call out of work and my team lead was like you're taking too many days off? And that was pretty much my warning. Hey, it's either you're here or you're there. And, of course, as a mom, in my heart I'm like I'm with my baby, I'm with him, and so I really was not at the time, taken into account the season that I was in, right, I really wanted to do everything that I could. Hey, my friend loving the conversation so far. If, joyfully, her has blessed your heart, tap subscribe so you never miss an episode and remember motherhood is so much more sweeter together. So take a second and share this podcast with a friend who needs encouragement too. Let's spread faith, joy and real talk about mom life and wife life, one episode at a time.

Speaker 1:

I know some people. They have to have a two income home and I understand that that is something that for many years that me and my husband talked about, I was able to stay at home with our children for a length of time, but we often went without right. We had to make a lot, a lot of sacrifices in order to make that happen. So I distinctly remember the Holy Spirit nudging me and saying that it's time to go. It was a summer, I had a summer off with my children and, and I had to go back to work that in a couple months after that, and during that time just we got to spend some really quality time, and I heard and felt that nudge, that it was time for me to turn in my notice. And so I tell you, when I was able to do that, the relief that I encountered or felt it was so healing for me I had been, I felt just broke down some because of my performance and not feeling like I was living up to the expectations of the job, which I wasn't, because I'm a mommy and I had not only my newborn son but I had two other children that I had to take care of.

Speaker 1:

But that burden, when I was able to do that, was such a relief, and so that is what I wanted to share with you today is that are you recognizing the season that God has you in at this time in your life? Maybe that means a deeper reflection of where you are, what you're doing and, literally, if you have to draw out a plate really drawing out a plate that has the different parts of your life on it and what you have taken on and maybe you need to look at that and see what do I need to take off my plate right now? What can I practically do to take off this thing off my plate? It means sometimes maybe there's a sport that your kids are not able to participate in because it's just too much for you to take them here and from to do all of those things.

Speaker 1:

What is it that you feel like? I need to create more balance and I need to recognize the season that I'm in right now and I need to take into account where I am in my life. What do I need to take off my plate? What do I need to take off my plate? What do I need to add? Who do I need to add to my plate or life that would help me balance, and we can talk more about that in our next video, where we're our podcast, where we are really going deeper in this three part series of balance. But I really want you to reflect on this. This is going to be so important for you, because if you are finding that every day you're drained emotionally, physically you're tired you're just so worn out. That's where I want to encourage you, dear sister, to take a step back, draw your plate, draw right whatever it is that you need to take into account of Lord and have the Holy Spirit lead you and guide you. Where do I need to make these adjustments? So that's some work there to do. I'm always about us going deeper and exploring a bit more so we can be better, because I know, I'm sure, that you want to be a great mother, a great wife, a great person in general, and sometimes these things get in our way from us being that type of woman that we want to be. The key is to really be productive not perfect, but productive.

Speaker 1:

I want to share a scripture with you and I really want you to ponder on this scripture and see where it leads you. So there is a scripture in 1 Corinthians, 3.12, that says if anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood or straw. Their work will be shown for what it is, because the day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person's life or work. So my question to you is does the work that you are doing meet the exchange rate of heaven?

Speaker 1:

Really, think about that when you are taking a step back and reevaluating what's on your plate. Think about the long term. Is this meeting the exchange rate of heaven? And what am I doing for the work of Christ? Am what I am doing, is it honoring God, and is it where God would have me to be Now being a wife? We know that is something that God created. It's a role that God created. It's a sacred role. We'll talk more about how much power you have as a wife and I don't want to say power in terms of anything that is witchcraft or anything like that, but I'm not talking about that or manipulation, but we're just talking about how much influence you have as a wife and also as a mother. These are the things that meet the exchange rate of heaven, and so how we are prioritizing these things, these roles, and what we're doing really, really will come into light at the final day, ok.

Speaker 1:

So I just really want you to ponder on that, really really sit with this, really expand on this and ask yourself the hard questions. Because I had to do this? I'm only saying this because I really had to sit down and ask myself these hard questions. Yes, there's going to be some conviction there, but that's okay. The Holy Spirit, we know in the word that there is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus. Okay, so you don't have to say in any type of condemnation, it's just to shift you into where God would have you to be. And I'm telling you, once you reevaluate the season, that you're in that overwhelm now. I'm not ever going to say that it won't ever come up, but the consistent overwhelm will start to dissipate.

Speaker 1:

So that's the part that I want you to tap into. That's what we're exploring over here at Joyfully Her. We are on a mission to help women in general to really live the lives that God has called them. I know that life is not going to be perfect. There are going to be sufferings and challenges, absolutely. But we also want to know and believe in our heart and experience the joy of the Lord which the Bible talks about the joy of the Lord is our strength, and that's what's going to help you get through this, and so thank you for joining me today.

Speaker 1:

Please come back. We are going to finish up the last part, our third part of the balance series, where I'm going to give you some more practical tips of how to balance and really experience joy on your walk as a wife and a mother, and we're just going to go there and so share your comments. I want to hear maybe there's some things that you do well as a mom that you balance pretty well. You learned over time. I want to hear that. I want to hear from you. So reach out, share your comments. I will reach back out to you. Thank you for joining me today. Subscribe and like and share with another mom who may need this encouragement. Thank you for joining Joyfully. Her.